When it falls apart

When it falls apart, remember to breathe. Sit still, if only for five minutes. Be there in that moment, which is the only moment that exists. Breathe and notice. Let whatever emotion is bubbling up to bubble up.

Breathe as you name it. Is it terror? Let it be there. Is it panic? Name it, feel it. Is it sorrow, grief, fear? Be with it. Not a wallowing, just a noticing.

Watch it, observe it. Do you feel its energy? It tingles, swirls, contracts, squeezes, compresses. It drops in the pit of your stomach. It pangs in your heart. It strains in your shoulders. It clenches in your jaw and tightens in your throat.

If, when your mind begins to spin out the worst-case scenarios, pause. Disrupt it.

Come back to the breath, notice and name the emotion(s) you’re feeling. Breathe in, breathe out.

“…We let the story line go and abide with the energy,” Pema Chodron says. Notice how it comes in, rises up, gets stronger. Emotions are fluid and dynamic energy. Be in the moment, not in the stories. “Our emotions can’t proliferate without our internal conversation…below the thoughts something remains—a vital, pulsating energy.” Feel, notice what you feel, and let it move through you like the energy that it is.

Notice the space in between. The heartache, fear, grief are not solid, immoveable, impenetrable blocks. They come and go like waves, and in between there are waves of gratitude and joy, too.

Thich Nhat Hanh teaches us that “With mindfulness…you can allow the pain to come up, you recognize it, embrace it tenderly, and look deeply into it. Embraced with the energy of mindfulness, concentration, and compassion, your pain will go down, losing some of its strength. And the next time it comes up, you allow it because you know how to handle it…the practice of mindfulness can be very healing.”

Quotes are from The Places that Scare You, by Pema Chodron, and Zen and the Art of Saving the Planet, by Thich Nhat Hanh.